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FRENCH LESSONS EVENTS & GIFTS

What is this thing?

When the complexities of another language confound you, sometimes you just have to laugh. Case in point the long-winded enquiry, “Qu'est-ce que c'est que cette chose-là?” Literally translated as “What is this that this is that this thing there?”. Or, in actual usage, “What is that/this thing?”

It seems even the French can see the humour in this unwieldy sentence. So, if you’re un apprenant*? Best not to overthink it and, instead, commit the phrase to memory. 

Or in conversation, you could always go for le plus concis*“C’est quoi, ça?” We’ll leave it in your capable hands (and limber lips). 

*a learner | *the more concise

English makes no sense

When learning a language, you just have to shrug and accept there will be some things that make no sense at all. And, if you need un gloussement*, this video perfectly illustrates the hurdles English learners face. Quel cauchemar*!

*a giggle | *a nightmare

SWOON: Saint-Émilion

Characterised by steep, winding cobblestone streets, Romanesque churches and ancient ruins, Saint-Émilion is un charmant* Medieval village in le cœur* of the Bordeaux wine region. A must-visit for oenophiles and history buffs, the UNESCO World Heritage site takes its name from a hermetic Breton monk, Émilion, who arrived in the 8th century and was known for performing miracles.

Home to Europe’s largest monolithic church, Saint-Émilion may no longer be a place of miracles. But, as you can see, it’s still quite magical. 

*a charming | *the heart

Pictures : whatoliviadid.com

Pardon My French

If you’re looking for un livre* to tuck into this winter, we have une suggestion*. A new memoir by freelance writer and mum-of-three Rachael Mogan McIntosh, Pardon My French tells the story of an Aussie family upping sticks to spend a year in cobblestoned Sommières – a small town in the south of France.

C’est une idée tentante, non*?

The book is touted as a tale of, “Food, faux pas and Franglish – one family’s riotous year in the south of France.” And we’ve been told by a student who’s midway through that it’s a delightful, funny and easy read. (As long as you don’t mind your books peppered with blue language.)

Intrigued? Here’s the publisher’s blurb.

At the school gate, when she accidentally kissed one new friend on the nose and called another a ‘beautiful man-horse’, Rachael realised that small-town France could hardly be more different to beach-side Australia. The smell of cigarettes replaced the tang of bone-broth and sprouted sourdough, the neighbours sometimes came to blows and under no circumstances would anyone wear activewear in public. Ever.

Muddling through every interaction in terrible French pushed Rachael’s family to their limits. Some days, everybody cried and ate their feelings with almond croissants. But the town of Sommières embraced these ragtag Australians, and the family fell in love with their temporary hometown and its outrageous gossip, cobblestoned beauty and kind, eccentric inhabitants.

Pardon My French is a candid, hilarious love letter to family life and France with three valuable lessons for overcoming adversity: make home a beautiful nest, lean into the tough lessons and look for the comedy in everything.

You can buy the book on Booktopia. Or read this article written by Rachael.

*a book | *a suggestion | *It’s a tempting idea, isn’t it?

La Petite Histoire

If you've ever done a group lesson here at Lingua Franca, you've probably come into contact with La Petite Histoire*. A tale with the very humblest of beginnings, it winds up becoming a rollicking schlockbuster as you move up the levels and your French improves enough to handle the outrageous (some would say impossible) turns of events of the six young friends.

La Petite Histoire is currently only available to our students, however La Préquelle is for everyone’s enjoyment. Below, another instalment of this new series, the final chapter of the Intermediate 3 level.

*The Little Story | *The Prequel

En entrant dans la librairie, j’ai eu le souffle coupé.

“Je crois que je suis au paradis !” je me suis dit. J’ai levé la tête pour voir les cinq étages, totalement bordés de livres de toute sorte.

Tout de suite, un jeune homme s’est approché de moi. “Hello, madam, can I help you at all?”

“Bonjour, euh, pardon…Hello,” j’ai dit en rougissant.

“Vous êtes française, madame ?”

“Oui,” j’ai dit. “Vous aussi ?”

“Non, je suis anglais, mais je parle français aussi,” il a répondu en souriant. “Vous préférez parler en anglais ou en français ?”

Je voulais pratiquer mon anglais (c’était la raison principale pour mon voyage, après tout), mais je me sentais un peu timide, je dois admettre. “French?” j’ai répondu et il a rigolé.

“Oui, bien sûr, madame. Avec grand plaisir.”

“Ah merci, c’est gentil. C’est mon premier jour ici à Londres, et c’est difficile pour moi de trouver les mots en anglais en ce moment.”

“Je comprends totalement, madame. Quand j’ai étudié le français à l’université, nous avons fait un échange en France et je me rappelle très bien de mon premier jour. J’ai eu peur d’ouvrir ma bouche !”

“Mais vous parlez tellement bien français, c’est difficile à croire,” j’ai dit.

“Vous me flattez, madame,” il a dit et j’ai rougi de nouveau.

Pour changer de sujet, je lui ai dit: “Cette librairie est extraordinaire. Cinq étages de livres en anglais, c’est mon rêve !”

“Oui, moi, je l’adore aussi, mais si vous aimez la langue anglaise, vous devez visiter The Bodleian Library à Oxford. C’est magnifique. Il y a plus d’un million de livres.”

“Oh là, là !” je me suis exclamée.

“Oh là, là !” il m’a taquiné, “You really are French ! Si je peux me permettre, comment vous appelez-vous ?” il m’a demandé.

“My name is Leïla,” j’ai dit lentement.

“Well, a pleasure to meet you, Leïla. Je m’appelle Will. À votre service.”

“Enchantée, Will, mais je regarde seulement.”

“C’est dommage,” il a dit et pour la troisième fois depuis cinq minutes, j’ai rougi.

“Je dois…I have to go now,” j’ai dit et je me suis dépêchée vers la porte.

“N’oubliez pas The Bodleian, Leïla !” il a crié “Et profitez de votre temps ici en Angleterre !”

“Oh là, là !” je me suis exclamée de nouveau en fermant la porte. “Ces hommes anglais !”

Je ne savais pas exactement pourquoi, mais tout d’un coup j’avais envie de parler à mes filles.

Il y avait une cabine téléphonique rouge juste à côté de la bibliothèque. J’ai appelé l’hôtel de Jean-Louis, mais le réceptionniste m’a dit qu’il n’était pas là. J’ai décidé d’appeler la maison et j’étais surprise quand il a répondu tout de suite.

“Chéri, c’est moi. Pourquoi tu n’es pas au travail ? Où sont les filles ? Elles sont avec toi ?”

“Ma belle, comment vas-tu? Tout va bien à Londres?” Jean-Louis a demandé. Il avait l’air un peu stressé.

“Oui, super, merci. Mais tout vas bien? Où sont les filles ? Elles sont avec ta mère?”

“Ne t’inquiète pas, Leïla, elles sont ici, avec moi. Nous sommes rentrés pour récupérer plus de vêtements.”

“Oh, elles sont là ? Je peux leur dire coucou ? Elles me manquent tellement.”

“Euh….non, désolée, ma belle, elles dorment.” Jean-Louis avait l’air distrait.

“Elles dorment ? À cinq heures de l’après-midi ?”

Et là, j’ai entendu la voix d’une femme, et ce n’était pas ma belle-mère. 

Upon entering the bookstore, I caught my breath.

“I think I’m in heaven!” I said to myself. I lifted my head to look at the five levels, totally lined with books of all sorts.

Straight away, a young man came up to me. “Hello, madam, can I help you at all?”

“Bonjour, um, sorry…Hello,” I said, blushing.

“Are you French, madam?”

“Yes,” I said. “You too?”

“No, I’m English, but I speak French as well,” he replied, smiling. “Do you prefer to speak in English or in French?”

I wanted to practise my English (it was the main reason for my trip, after all), but I felt a bit shy, I have to admit. “French?” I answered and he laughed.

“Yes, of course, madam. With much pleasure.”

“Oh thank you, that’s kind. It’s my first day here in London, and it’s difficult for me to find the words in English at the moment.”

“I understand totally, madam. When I studied French at university, we did an exchange and I remember very well my first day. I was scared to open my mouth!”

“But you speak French so well, it’s difficult to believe,” I said.

“You flatter me, madam,” he said and I blushed again.

To change the subject, I said to him: “This bookstore is extraordinary. Five levels of books in English, it’s my dream!”

“Yes, I love it, too, but if you like the English language, you must visit the Bodleian Library in Oxford. It’s magnificent. There are more than a million books.”

“Oh là, là !” I exclaimed.

“Oh là, là !” he teased me. “You really are French. If I may allow myself, what is your name?” he asked me.

“My name is Leïla,” I said slowly.

“Well, a pleasure to meet you, Leïla. My name is Will. At your service.”

“Pleased to meet you, Will, but I’m only looking.”

“That’s a shame,” he said and for the third time in five minutes, I blushed.

“Je dois…I have to go now,” I said and I hurried towards the door.

“Don’t forget The Bodleian, Leïla!” he cried, “and make the most of your time here in England!”

“Oh là, là !” I exclaimed to myself again as I closed the door. “These English men!”

I didn’t know exactly why, but all of a sudden I felt like talking to my girls.

There was a red phone box just next to the bookstore.I called Jean-Louis’ hotel but the receptionist told me he wasn’t there. I decided to call the house and I was surprised when he responded straight away.

“Darling, it’s me. Why aren’t you at work? Where are the girls? Are they with you?”

“My beauty, how are you? Is everything going well in London?” Jean-Louis asked. He seemed a bit stressed.

“Yes, great, thanks. But is everything okay? Where are the girls? Are they with your mother?”

“Don’t worry Leïla, they’re here, with me. We came back to pick up some more clothes.”

“Oh, they’re there? Can I say a quick hi? I miss them so much.”

“Um…no, sorry, my beauty, they’re sleeping.” Jean-Louis seemed distracted.

“They’re sleeping? At five o’clock in the afternoon?”

“And then, I heard a woman’s voice, and it wasn’t my mother-in-law’s.

My Paris Adventure (Part 3 – La Fin)

So, two months have passed and our intrepid traveller Pip est rentrée* from her French sojourn. We touched base briefly to see how she’s recovering, any lessons learned and her top tips for any chouchous* planning a long stay in Paris.

YOU’RE BACK! THAT WENT QUICKLY…

Way too quickly! I arrived back a few days ago and am battling with jetlag and Paris withdrawals. I can’t believe that after all the planning and buildup it’s over. At the start, two months seemed quite daunting, but I definitely wasn’t ready to come home. I’d just found my groove at the end and my apartment and quartier* really felt like home.

SO, YOU LOVED IT?

Presque* every minute.

WHAT ADVICE WOULD YOU GIVE ANYONE PLANNING A SIMILAR TRIP?

Firstly (and most importantly), make finding a decent coffee spot a priority. Otherwise you’ll end up paying $8-9 for a weak, milky cup of sludge each morning. My pick if you’re near Le Marais is the boutique Japanese chain, The Coffee. They take their brew seriously and it shows.

For easy-peasy travel, make sure you download Citymapper. This app provides amazingly clear instructions for getting from A to B, including which section of the train you should be on to land at the right exit. A total life safer for someone as directionally challenged as me! 

When people say it gets hot in summer, believe them. As a Brisbanite, I laughed off this warning. But by the end of my stay, it was STINKING hot. And the city is just not built for it.

Don’t pack exercise gear. Seriously. You’ll be doing so much walking each day that you won’t dust off your actual runners and Lululemons at all. And unless you’re staying in a hotel and plan on catching Ubers to dinner, leave les talons* at home.

Also, beware the cyclists! Trying to cross the road takes some getting used to as you need to check the bike lane as well as the traffic lights. And the cyclists tend to be un peu fou*.

WHAT ABOUT TIPS FOR LEARNING THE LANGUAGE?

It depends on your goals. For me, it was more about enjoying a change of scene and soaking up the culture and picking some more French up along the way. I had work to juggle so I wasn’t going to spend my free time studying when there was Paris at my doorstep to explore!

I highly recommend doing an immersion course (I went to Langue Appart for 4 weeks). But I think if want to learn a lot in a short time frame, there are better ways – and places – to go about it. It’s difficult to do a true immersion in Paris with so many tourists and everyone automatically switching to English when you speak.

In the future, I’d be interested to explore other options. Like a homestay in a quieter city or the countryside. Somewhere with fewer shiny distractions. And I’d also book private lessons.

Another thing… I had an Aussie friend stay with me for two weeks and that, while one of the highlights of my stay, put my French back a lot. So, if you’re serious about improving, dit non* to any English-speaking visitors.

ANY OTHER TIPS FOR THINGS TO SEE, DO, EAT?

I won’t list all my favourite spots in Paris as it would take all day (and I’ll get too nostalgic/ hungry). But I would recommend you book most of your activities well in advance as they book out.  

Look at Discover Walks, too. They operate free, tip-supported tours in different parts of Paris and the guides are great. The one I did in Montmartre was exceptional.

Finally, try to factor in some free time. With so much to do and see, it’s tempting to schedule every minute. But my favourite moments were often unplanned – discovering hidden parks and pop-up shops, enjoying an impromptu spritz in the gorgeous courtyard at Le Musée Carnavalet or strolling aimlessly around town for White Night and La Fête de la Musique. Being une flâneuse* in Paris is one life's great joys. 

*has returned | *teacher’s pets | *neighbourhood | *nearly | *high heels | *a bit mad | *say no | *urban spectator who walks around not doing anything in particular but watching people and society

Beyond Paris

As the world’s most visited city, Paris is undeniably magical. Toutefois*, it’s not the only ville* in France worth the plane fare (or TGV trip). From indulging in Michelin-starred gastronomy in Lyon to hiking in Corsica or catching rays on the Cote d’Azur, this article provides plenty of inspo for your next visit à l’étranger*.

*However | *city | *overseas

Fancy a home in Provence?

If you’ve been dreaming of buying or renting a bolthole en France*, today might just be your lucky day. A former Lingua Franca couple is looking to sell their share in a lovely holiday home in Provence!

Regarde* the description and images below and on the AirBnB listing here  – the property is also available à louer*. C’est un rêve, non*?

Home in Provence

Ever dreamed of a home-away-from-home in France? Our lovely terrace house in the Vaucluse Department of Provence is available for rent! It has two bedrooms (2 queen beds and one single) so can easily accommodate a family of five for a delightful sojourn.

Our house is situated in an historic town in the lands around Avignon once owned by the Popes when they moved out of Rome and lived for most of the 14th century in Avignon. It has a medieval wall around the town, and our house is built into the wall, next to the “new gate: Le Portail Neuf”. From the top-floor balcony, there are views of Mont Ventoux, often featured in the Tour-de-France.

The town is Beaumes-de-Venise, famous for its muscat wine (often found on the dessert-wine list of Australia’s best restaurants). This lovely little town is central to a beautiful area of Provence dotted with numerous small towns with markets and many historic attractions accessible for delightful daytrips.

À louer
The house can be rented either on AirBnB for $160 AUD per night, or through the owners, Jane & Tony, long-time Lingua Franca students, for only 120 euros per week.

À vendre
The house is wholly owned by 12 Australians through an Australian company, and we own two of those twelve shares. The house is valued at approximately 240,000 euros ($AUD360,000). We have found we don’t fully utilise our two shares, so if anyone is interested in purchasing one of the shares, please contact Jane to discuss on mob: 0414 842 199 or email: aocbdv53@gmail.com

*en France | *look | *to rent | *It’s a dream, isn’t it?

La Petite Histoire

If you've ever done a group lesson here at Lingua Franca, you've probably come into contact with La Petite Histoire*. A tale with the very humblest of beginnings, it winds up becoming a rollicking schlockbuster as you move up the levels and your French improves enough to handle the outrageous (some would say impossible) turns of events of the six young friends.

La Petite Histoire is currently only available to our students, however La Préquelle is for everyone’s enjoyment. Below, another instalment of this new series, Chapter 5 of the Intermediate 3 level.

*The Little Story | *The Prequel

“Veuillez attacher votre ceinture, s’il vous plaît, Madame. Nous allons atterrir à Heathrow bientôt.” L’hôtesse de l’air a souri gentiment et a continué le long du couloir en faisant ses contrôles de sécurité.

J’ai regardé Anouk qui avait les yeux fixés sur les nuages vers l’extérieur de l’hublot.

“Maman, on va pouvoir voir la maison de la Reine d’ici ?” elle m’a demandé. Elle avait l’air sérieuse.

“C’est un peu plus grand qu’une maison, chérie,” je lui ai dit “mais on ne sait jamais. En fait, demain on va voir sa maison de plus près quand Tatie Amina nous montrera les sites touristiques de Londres.”

“Ah,” elle a dit, ses yeux grands ouverts. “J’espère qu’on la voit.”

“On verra, ma petite,” je l’ai rassurée en prenant sa main pour l’atterrissage.

Trois heures plus tard on est arrivés à notre l’hôtel, près de la station de métro Gloucester Road. J’étais absolument ravie d’être à Londres pour la première fois. Tout me semblait tellement charmant, même si c’était une des plus grandes villes du monde. “Paris est sublime,” je me suis dit, “mais cette ville a un vrai caractère. Je l’adore déjà.”

Nous nous sommes installés dans nos chambres d’hôtel respectives et le plan était de se reposer un peu avant d’aller dîner à Covent Garden. Il était 14h30. Anouk avait l’air très fatigué, la pauvre. Moi, par contre, j’étais très impatiente de sortir de l’hôtel pour pouvoir découvrir le quartier. J’ai demandé à Amina et Hervé de garder Anouk pour une heure ou deux et heureusement ils étaient d’accord. J’ai pris la clef de ma chambre et je suis allée parler avec le concierge pour lui demander les directions jusqu’au métro, ou The Underground, comme disent les Anglais.

Après un peu de confusion à propos de la prononciation du nom “Gloucester” (je ne comprendrai jamais les règles de prononciation de l’anglais !) j’ai quitté l’hôtel avec un plan du quartier, un grand sourire et une forte envie de me plonger dans cette ville fascinante.

Je ne pouvais pas en croire mes yeux quand j’ai vu mon premier autobus à impériale rouge en vraie. J’avais le sens du déjà-vu comme il y avait souvent des photos de ces bus iconiques dans les pages de nos textes d’anglais.

Une heure plus tard, je me promenais toujours. Loin de mes responsabilités, je me sentais plus légère et j’avais l’impression d’être libre. Dans une sorte de rêverie, je me suis perdue un peu alors quand j’ai vu une librairie absolument charmante, j’ai décidé d’y entrer pour demander mon chemin. Je ne le savais pas à l’époque mais cette décision aller changer ma vie. 

“Could you attach your seatbelt, please, madam. We are going to land at Heathrow soon.” The air hostess smiled kindly and continued along the aisle doing her security checks.

I looked at Anouk, who was staring at the clouds through the window.

“Mum, are we going to be able to see the Queen’s house from here?” she asked me. She seemed serious.

“It’s a bit bigger than a house, darling,” I said to her “but we never know. In fact, tomorrow we’re going to see her house from closer up when Aunty Amina shows us the tourist sights of London.”

“Oh,” she said, her eyes round. “I hope we see her.”

“We’ll see, little one,” I reassured her taking her hand for the landing.

Three hours later we arrived at our hotel, close to the tube station Gloucester Road.

I was absolutely delighted to be in London for the first time. Everything seemed so charming to me, even if it was one of the biggest cities in the world. “Paris is sublime,” I said to myself, “but this city has real personality. I love it already.”

We settled into our respective hotel rooms and the plan was to have a bit of a rest before going to dinner in Covent Garden. It was 2:30pm. Anouk seemed very tired, the poor thing. I, on the other hand, was impatient to leave the hotel to explore the area. I asked Amina and Hervé to look after Anouk for an hour or two and luckily they agreed. I took my room key and I went to talk to the concierge to ask him directions to the tube station, or ‘The Underground”, as the English say.

After a bit of confusion about the pronunciation of the word “Gloucester” (I will never understand the rules of English pronunciation!) I left the hotel with a map of the area, a big smile and a strong desire dive into this fascinating city.

I could not believe my eyes when I saw my first red double-decker bus in real life. I had a feeling of déjà vu as there were often photos of these iconic buses in our English textbooks.

An hour later, I was still walking. Far from my responsibilities, I feel lighter and I felt like I was free. In a sort of dream-like state, I got a little lost so when I saw an absolutely charming bookshop, I decided to go in to ask for directions. I didn’t know it at the time, but this decision would change my life.
 

My Paris Adventure (Part 2)

Last month we heard from one of our students, Pip, who was about to depart on a two-month adventure in Paris. Well, it’s been presque cinq semaines*, so we thought it was high time we check in to see what she’s been up to!

SO… HOW’S EVERYTHING BEEN GOING?

Très bien*! It has absolutely flown by, and I can’t believe I only have a few weeks left. There’s still so much on my (ever-growing) to-do list! The first month was wonderful but a bit intense as I was working remotely and was also doing daily immersion classes. So I was cramming in most of my sightseeing on the weekends.

I’ve just finished my French lessons now and am feeling much more relaxed. My best friend arrives this week and I finally have some time off work, so that will be lots of fun.

I’m loving Paris and am very happy with the bobo* area I am in (Voltaire, in the 11th) as it’s central and a short stroll to Place des Vosges. Paris’s oldest (and prettiest) square is one of my absolute favourite spots for lounging with a coffee and croissant. Or une glace* now it’s so warm.

ANY HIGHLIGHTS SO FAR?

So many. Every successful interaction en français*; watching the light projections at le Square du Vert-Galant for Nuit Blanche*; seeing a classical concert at La Sainte-Chapelle with the sun streaming in through the famous stained glass windows (a must); perusing le Musée Picasso – the current exhibition with art direction by Paul Smith is incredible, but just as amazing is the 17th-century private mansion it’s housed in – divine.

Also, my first pain au chocolat; visiting Versailles and the equally impressive Opéra Garnier; strolling Canal St Martin; thumbing through books at the legendary Shakespeare and Company bookstore; dinner in the most stunning garden at l’Hôtel Particulier in Montmartre. The service was questionable, but the location is so breathtakingly beautiful it was worth the 90-odd minute wait for our entrées.

I also loved the tranquil garden (and mint green tiles) at the Grand Mosquée. An unexpected side of Paris and well worth a visit.

There have been times when I’ve been moved to tears by the sheer beauty (and Frenchness) of it all. I still grin from ear to ear whenever I see La Tour Eiffel. Seeing this accordion player and his cat in Montmartre today was more than I could take. And I’ve also met some lovely people along the way.

AND LOWLIGHTS?

That’s not to say it’s been easy. It hasn’t. There were a few issues with my Airbnb when I arrived (terrible bed, for starters), but I am lucky to have a great property manager who dealt with my list of complaints promptly. The neighbours tend to have parties at unpredictable times (say 2am on a Monday). Juggling work and school has been exhausting, I’ve been sick and I’ve had a lot of FOMO.  

Mon chat me manque beaucoup*. But, in a strange twist of fate, there’s a cat café on my street (yes, I did go once after a bad day. The food was hideous, but I made a friend who lives in London).

I also had un incident malheureux* involving a very long, stressful and rainy day, a traditional Jewish fallafel sandwich from the iconic L'As du Fallafel in Le Marais and a day-old Sézane trench coat. One trip au pressing*, $60 and a two-week wait later, I got my coat back just as summer finally arrived.

HAS ANYTHING SURPRISED YOU?

The lack of screw-top wine bottles anywhere. That the French seemingly have a thing for escape rooms (there’s a surprising number in my quartier). That you’ll have to queue not just for museums but to go into stores like Polène and Sézane.

Also, Parisians are nothing like the aloof stereotype we’re familiar with. 90% of my interactions have been positive and, as long as you’re polite, decisive (they don’t like dilly-dallying) and try to speak French, they’re quite chaleureux* and helpful.  

YOU ENROLLED IN AN IMMERSION OVER THERE. HOW WAS THAT?

It was chouette*. I went to Langue Appart in Oberkampf (11th) – a 10-minute walk from my apartment. I would definitely recommend it, it’s a great little school. The teachers are excellent (they all have a different teaching style from what I’ve heard), and all the staff welcome you by name. The materials are very comprehensive, it’s all conducted in French and the lessons are a mix of grammar (argh), videos, games and lots of speaking practice and practical exercises.

There are also a few social activities: drinks; an excursion – we learned all about La Commune and the history of the artsy 20th arrondissement and Père-Lachaise; and an international ‘picnic’ held indoors (I went to three stores only to be forced to make Anzac biscuits with honey instead of golden syrup… not the same).

However, you really do need to be motivated. The students come from all over the globe and are predominantly young, well-educated and highly intelligent (lots of med and law students in my batch). If you slack off, you’ll very quickly feel out of your depth.

ARE YOU FEELING MORE CONFIDENT WITH FRENCH?

Hmmm, bonne question*. I think I had an unrealistic expectation of how much I’d learn by osmosis over here. I now realise I would need a good six months of full immersion to be anywhere even close to fluent.

After having done the intensive course, all the tenses are a lot clearer in my head. My reading is better (but that’s always been my strength) and my listening has improved, largely from eavesdropping on people. However, speaking… I still struggle a lot. (Having said that, immediately after writing this the lady at the métro station complimented me on my French and made my day.)

The number of times I’ve walked off only to realise I said something incorrectly in conversation is higher than I’d like to admit. But I’ve been trying and, by and large, the French have been quite supportive – if a little amused at times (especially at the chemist).

When shop assistants realise you’re not French, they’ll sometimes ask if you’d prefer them to speak in English or French. I find this really helpful and always opt for French. However, there are many more who’ll automatically switch to English. In which case I just keep trying to answer in French to get them to revert back :).

HAVE YOU BEEN ENJOYING THE FRENCH CUISINE?

Far too much! I’m particularly partial to galettes. However, the extremely carb-heavy French diet is less than ideal for a type 1 diabetic... I’m also desperate for some spice in my life, so have booked a Mexican restaurant for when I’m in London next week.

WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO FOR THE REST OF YOUR STAY?

Ma meilleure amie* arrives soon, and I can’t wait to play tourist (and directionally challenged tour guide). I had another friend here from Sweden for a weekend which was so lovely, but other than that I’ve largely been flying solo. It’s been fine during the day, but I’m looking forward to more nighttime exploring.

I’m also excited to see Paris through a fresh set of eyes now I’m a ‘local’.

*nearly 5 weeks | *Very well! | *short for bourgeois-bohemian (hipster)| *an ice cream | *in French | *White Night | *I miss my cat a lot | *an unfortunate incident | *to the dry cleaners | *warm | *great | *good question | *My best friend

Le Top 5 tips for speaking French.

I know I’m speaking a lot about my new-found love for tennis at the moment, but it’s very hard to ignore the parallels between trying to learn French and picking up a tennis racket again after a 40-year gap (and I was no Navratilova in the first place, je vous assure*).

My friend and I started hitting balls late last year and loved it so much we decided to do it more regularly in 2023. After a few sessions, though, it became clear we needed some help, so we started doing a lesson before work on a Thursday and then having a hit on a Saturday.

We dream of being able to turn up and spend the whole hour on the court, rallying back and forth to one another in a calm and competent manner. You won’t be surprised to hear that our current experience is a very long way from that. Some days we manage to hit a few shots in a row, but many, many balles de tennis* end up going straight into the net or way over the baseline at the other end. One or two have even somehow gone through a mysterious hole in my strings and hit the fence behind me, but we won’t dwell on those ones.

A very similar thing may happen to you when you try to speak French. We know that most of you are borderline fluent when under the shower or when driving, but when it comes the time to have a real conversation with another person, suddenly you find yourself afflicted with all manner of trous de mémoires*.

For beginners, this can be put down to nerves and is completely natural, but what if you’ve been doing French for a while and you still draw a blank? Or worse, find yourself heading down a rabbit hole from which there appears to be no return?

We find this usually happens because you’re trying to speak French as you do English (or your native language, whatever that may be). I really don’t enjoy saying this, but it’s simply impossible for most of us.

The average adult knows between 25 000 and 35 000 words in their mother tongue. By the end of our Absolute Beginner 1 course, you’ll know approximately 200 words, so if you extrapolate that figure, by the time you’ve completed our Intermediate Revision Course you’d know about 2 500 words. That is, you have approximately 10% of the word power in French that you do in English.

But, don’t be too déçu(e)*. You can absolutely make this work to your advantage. Over the course of the next few newsletters, I’ll be offering up my top five tips as to how to pull that off.

You’ll definitely notice there’s a running theme in all of the tips. If you remember nothing else, please learn this one par cœur*: lentement mais sûrement*.

So you know by now that my dream of lazily (and competently) rallying with my friend from either side of the net is on hold as we get to grips with the basics.

At one of our very first lessons, as Vince, our tennis coach, watched Tanya and I flail around the court trying to hit winners (which were for the great majority definitely losers), he casually mentioned the concept of the 100-point rally. Naturellement*, this stopped us in our tracks. The tennis definition of the word rally “is a sequence of back and forth shots between players” and I’m pretty sure two shots in a row is stretching the meaning of the word ‘sequence’. Vince gently suggested that the next time we had a hit together, we have as our goal to reach a 100-point rally without an error. Jaws on the floor, Tanya and I paused to consider just how gently and carefully we’d need to hit the ball if we were to get beyond 10 points in a row, let alone 100. Firstly, we’d have to move much closer to the net to reduce the margin for error. We’d have to take care to make sure the ball simply hit the strings, rather than try to erase the Dunlop logo with each whack. Lastly, we’d have to be mindful of where the other was standing to make sure the shot was easy for them to reach (needless to say our footwork is inexistant* at this point).

Every single bit of this can be applied to speaking French and another definition of the word ‘rally’ might be worth bearing in mind: to draw or call (persons) together for a common action or effort. 

Sure, when you’re approaching fluency, knock your socks off by adding flourishes and brilliant tournures de phrases*, but when you’re just  starting out, be a good partner to your interlocuteur*. That is, physically position yourself in a comfortable manner to get ready to communicate. This means: lower the shoulders, take a couple of deep breaths to centre yourself, open up your body language and look your partner in the eye.  Take another slow breath et voilà*! You’re closer to the net already.

Next, scrap the complicated English sentence you’re dying to communicate, and instead, imagine you’re about to explain that same idea to a four-year-old. How would you speak? Slowly? Carefully? Using simple language? Pausing every now and then to check they were following? Oui*? Now you’re on the path to success.

Imagine the opening question was “What are you doing today after the class?”. Instead of trying to say (to use an example from a recent class, merci* Martha!) “I’ve gotta rush home because I’ve got a guy coming to sand and reseal the deck” try this instead: “Aujourd’hui, après la classe, un homme vient à la maison. Il va travailler sur mon balcon.” Granted, not textbook perfect French, but you’ve got your message across, probably in a slow and deliberate manner but also hopefully (and this is by far the most important bit) in a way that is easily comprehensible.

Finally, be kind to your speaking partner, particularly if they’re not quite as advanced as you. This goes back to the four-year-old idea. Be sure to choose simple words and phrases you think your French-speaking buddy will understand. Don’t deny them the incredible pleasure of understanding a couple of simple sentences in a French they’re likely to be familiar with. You know the feeling yourself, so be sure to share it around as much as you can.

I really hope this advice doesn’t come across as patronising as it is sûrement* not my intent. You know how to communicate extremely well in your mother tongues, quite likely a great deal better than me. What I notice, though, is that in our excitement (anxiety?) to speak French, we sometimes forget the basics. It is my strong belief that if you can adopt this approach the next time you have a go at speaking, you’ll see more smiles than frowns, and that goes for your classroom potes* and ‘real’ French people as well.

Next month: walk before you can run.

Bon courage*!

*I assure you | *tennis balls | *memory lapses | *disappointed | *by heart | *slowly but surely | *Naturally | *non-existent | *turns of phrase | *fellow speaker | *there you go | *Yes | *thank you | *Today, after the class, a man is coming to the house. He is going to work on my balcony. | *surely | *mates | *Good luck

New Series: Liaison

With winter here, you might be looking for a new French series to dig into on those chilly(ish) nights in. Well, tu as de la chance* because Apple TV has delivered Liaison. With the star power of Vincent Cassel and Eva Green, this glossy, 6-part thriller has received somewhat mixed reviews. However, one of our chouchous* insists it’s worth a binge. 

Filmed in French and English, Liaison features Green and Cassel as agents and former lovers working together to combat international cyberattacks threatening the UK. And, unlike many hard-to-follow films, the French parts are relatively clear and easy to understand. 

Intrigued? Have a look at la bande annonce* here and see if it’s ton truc*.  

*you’re in luck | *preview | *your thing

English – C’est compliqué aussi!

Ever find yourself cursing the day you decided to learn the beautiful, complicated language that is French? Well, spare a thought for English learners because it's no cakewalk for them, either.

Not convinced? We’ll just leave this right here.

Le subjonctif* isn’t looking like quite as much of un cauchemar* now, is it?

Merci, Hayley, pour cette petite perle*.

*The subjunctive | *a nightmare | *Thanks, Hayley, for this little gem

My Paris Adventure

This month we have a slightly different spin on our regular ‘My French Adventure’ interview series as one of our chouchous* is off on a real adventure. Pip’s been a student at Lingua Franca since our Masters Street days and, after plusieurs* months of planning, is about to depart on an 8-week holiday à Paris*. Jaloux? Nous aussi*.

WHAT MADE YOU DECIDE TO HEAD TO PARIS?

Watching Emily in Paris. Je plaisante*! It’s honestly something I have wanted to do since forever. I’ve studied French on and off for years (with une enorme pause* between studying at high school and starting at Lingua Franca a few years back) and have always wanted to spend a few months there to really improve my grasp on the language.

A trip was in the back of my mind, then Covid struck. Now travel is back on the agenda, it seemed like the time was right. I’m self-employed and have no major commitments here (other than a very needy chat*), so it was a case of ‘pourquoi pas*?’.

WHAT WILL YOU BE DOING THERE?

I’ll be doing a bit of an immersion and working remotely for my clients (unfortunately someone needs to pay my mortgage and Airbnb fees). I’ll take a few weeks off and have two friends visiting, but otherwise, I want to try and avoid English speakers to make the most of the experience. I plan to be based in Paris and live like a local as much as possible but will do some day trips here and there.

WHICH AREA ARE YOU STAYING IN?

I’m staying in the 11th. I chose it as it’s quite nice and central yet relatively affordable and because there seems to be a good language school in the area (will report back). I also wanted a more lowkey ‘local’ experience rather than staying in a touristy or grand arrondissement* and peering into the designer boutiques and antique stores feeling like a paysanne*.

Katrina helped me make my decision and I’ve since heard from some Parisian contacts that it's a great area, so I can’t wait to check it out.

HAVE YOU HAD ANY TROUBLE BOOKING YOUR TRIP?

Bien sûr*. As they say, nothing worth doing is ever easy, and there have been some bumps along the way. One of the biggest challenges was finding accommodation due to the Bail Mobilité law. I don’t fully understand the ins and outs, but you essentially need to prove you’re either working or studying to be eligible to rent most properties on Airbnb (for longer than a month). And working remotely and doing casual, non-tertiary study doesn’t cut it.

So I had to trawl through hundreds of listings to find a suitable property as there’s no way of filtering them. It was un cauchemar* but I got there in the end.

Then there are the protests around the retirement age reform... I considered changing my dates for a while but once they started collecting the rubbish again, I thought I’d take my chances!

WHAT ARE YOU MOST LOOKING FORWARD TO?

At the moment, I’m looking forward to getting on that plane and being able to switch off! But after that, just strolling around and exploring at my leisure. I have a giant list of things to do, see and book. But my favourite part of travelling is always the unexpected discoveries you make when mooching about.  

Then, of course, there's the food. I’ve booked an extortionate dinner at the Jules Verne restaurant in the Eiffel Tower, but I'm equally excited about croissants and fromage* in the park.

GOALS WITH THE FRENCH LANGUAGE

I’ve booked in for a few weeks of immersion to start with, then I’m going to play it by ear. I didn’t want to overcommit and have the school component feel like a chore, especially as I’ll be working too. At the end of the day, I’m mainly hoping to soak up all Paris has to offer. If I manage to become more confident with speaking French along the way, ça sera la cerise sur le gâteau*.

*teacher’s pets | *several | *in Paris | *Jealous? Us too | *I’m joking | *a huge break | *cat |*why not? | *district | *peasant | *Of course | *Mobility lease |*cheese | *that will be the cherry on top (literal translation ‘the cherry on the cake’)